Its been one year three months since I have meet these children. If you have kept with out post you will know its not been easy. For them, for us. Its been life changing to say least. I remember writing this post last year saying that you may notice small positive changes around month three. I must have had to many MIKES because the small changes came and went just as fast. BUT the ugly feelings of one girl, is seeming to be less and less intrusive to her sweet insides. She is such a different girl than last year. We are such different parents. Here is a conversation my mom overheard with her little brother.
E " I like my mom and dad, but I don't love them!" The discipline me!"
G: "Our mom and dad adopted us, they are giving us a life we never would have had in Ghana. You get to eat, you get to go to school, you get to wear clothes you have to have things, they discipline you because YOU DON"T listen. You need to have love for them!" when my mom asked G: "so what about you do you like them....
NO, I LOVE THEM!" sob.
First of all this is the first time that she has said adopted regarding herself. That SHE has been adopted. Second of all, SHE knows that discipline is because of love for a child with trauma that's HUGE. Third, she understands that she did not have the resources that she is getting here. I am not looking for a pat on the back with that last epiphany. With our previous conversations she has never really admitted the poverty level at which she was living. In our conversations her family would take her to Starbucks and purchase vast amounts of clothing for her. So, this lets me know that she is facing reality, maybe not accepting it but at least facing it. Its healthy!
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