Saturday, January 17, 2009

Getting over the Label!

I know just yesterday I posted a very raw post and today you read that I am over it? Let me tell you what I am over. I am over the label! I went to the library and started reading a book called out of sync child its a book that has huge amounts of information on the disorder I believe both my kids have. For the past few days I have been in a pit about the label stigma that goes along with the disorder for my children and also down because I feel that some how I have done something wrong during pregnancy. Reading the information and the comments you have left for me, I am beginning to see my children in new light. When our children would misbehave and we would really struggle with the same behavior time and time again, we get so irritated and feel like we just got to give them more of a discipline; reading the information in the book has made me realize the struggle we have are very connected to this disorder. Such as my oldest brushing his teeth and crying when we do it for him because he doesn't do it hard enough. Or A the little big guy his body goes completely limp sometimes and he complains that he cant walk or move, I used to think he is so lazy. I have even made comments like ''Come on A no time to be lazy, we gotta go!'' Now I realize that really he has no energy. Going to Occupational therapy and having them on a sensory diet will make such a huge progress for them.
The label does not change my love for them, it does not change they way I feel about them, It needs to not change the way I feel about myself! These boys were given (borrowed) to be because my Mighty Father knows I am the mom for them!! I can not be responsible for the way others treat them but by golly watch for the claws! What can I say, I am Latina! This doesn't change my heart to grow my family either, one thing that was a struggle for me. I thought how can I have more children if these kids would take up all my energy. Would I still say the same thing two weeks ago? NO, so really doesn't change my heart on this issue either. I feel good, I feel relived for the mere fact of knowing. I feel a wind under my wing. I am not alone. If my mom is reading this it would help if you packed up and moved here to help me out :)
My boys are fun, very smart, loving, caring, and AWESOME, Thank you Jesus for them! Thanks for praying for me and please continue!

5 comments:

The Tulloss Family said...

You're so awesome Natalie. I'm so happy that you were able to find some comfort and insight so quickly. And you are so right about being the mom that God chose for your boys. All of this will serve a mighty purpose in God's kingdom!

The Gresham Clan said...

Natalie, You are truly amazing! I just read both of your posts and I am totally praying for you in this time of trial and figuring out how this will all work. You are SOOOO right when you say that God knew what he was doing when he gave these amazing boys to you! Thank you for your honesty and showing all of us how to reach out to God even when things get really tough. Praying my friend!

Heckert's Highway said...

Woohooooo Natalie!!!! I'm so excited that you are finding the wisdom that you need. And that you are hearing the truth that the Father is speaking to you about this. I love you and will continue to pray for you through this!!

Wendi said...

good momma! God gives more grace...

tuesdaymom said...

Just wanted you to know that I understand where you are and what you're saying. We found out a year ago that our eldest has high-functioning autism and our youngest very likely has SID. (Funny how it runs in families...) I've been clinging to Romans 8:26-28 and Psalm 103 since then. You can find me at tuesdaymachine.blogspot.com. We're waiting for court in the AGCI Ethiopia program -- I found you through Amy G's blog.
God bless,
Sarah

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Pray for sweet Abby Riggs!!